some days

some days are hard
so hard
and no matter how much we try to distract and numb ourselves from the pain and discomfort
we just can't
we know it's there
underneath,
it happens.
to all of us.
and time and time again, this humble realization takes me back to compassion…
compassion for all of it.
the pain or joy you feel
is no different than what your neighbor, stranger or best friend feels.
owie. living hurts, sometimes.
and
living is absolutely ecstatic, sometimes.
you are far from alone.
you, we, are one.
so when you laugh,
laugh as deeply as you can.
and when you cry,
cry as deeply as you can.
for this is the experience of life…
and this experience too, shall pass.

truth resides.

truth...
residing in my heart struggles to meet my lips.
at a loss for words --
i realize that
i am the only true knower of my experience.
and so i observe...
and allow all that is,
to simply unfold before me.
and so it is, and so it will be.
truth...

all that I want

all that I want
is to humbly bow before you
(my love)
and for you to see me
to
see
me
with your
mind, body, soul
beyond what's in front of you
beneath the skin
behind my eyes
and to love me
unconditionally
for all you see

tenderness.

To have a tender heart is a courageous and divine commitment.  For within this tenderness a ceaseless vulnerability exists.  Capable of endless, unconditional love; and open-wide for the world’s indulgence… and also for its wrath.  A sensitivity deeper than the depth of the universe – exposing itself, boldly -- so to experience the intensity of existence – of love, of fear, and all that lies between.  The heart steadfastly wavers through these emotions and experiences – gently and hastily expanding and contracting in this delicate dance to the music of truth.  And through this dance, truth reveals that fear is really only the absence of love… and that love is the greatest truth, with the power to protect and gracefully strengthen even the most delicate of hearts. 

just a moment

do you realize...

we are here impermanently?

and that at any moment,

that moment could be it.

i don't know what to make of that…

but each time this awareness presents itself to me, 

i have an inner knowing…

that my 

EXISTENCE 

is 

FOR A REASON.

and even if at this moment that reason is unknown….

i understand deeply that every second matters.

and this subtle reminder…

brings me back...

to my body, to my breath, to this moment.

where liveliness lives, and joy resides.

yearns

and my heart still yearns for you
after all these years
proof that love exists outside of space
and outside of time
and so
all that i can do
is love you from afar
hoping somehow
it reaches you

in dialogue with my heart

at times,
my thoughts are angry, selfish and
bitter…
at times,
my thoughts are painful.
yet i still hold onto them,
as if they are a part of me…
or all of me.
my identit(y)ies.
my self. 

these thoughts are in dialogue with my heart.
with this dialogue i sense, i see,
i become aware...
of my lack of gratitude -
my lack of patience and peace -
for all that is...
and at times,
this awareness gracefully co-exists
with the persistent tantrums of my mind.
even when i know, in my soul,
that
i
am
so
blessed.
for blessings exist in every moment of life.
and moments are life.
and, the essence of a moment…
exists in how it
makes you feel.
and,
here we are,
emotions,
rising and falling
with every passing moment.
a continuous cycle…
always sensing for
that middle ground.
where,
no matter what -
all feels right
in that moment…
the moment(s) of eternal balance.