good.

"being a good person is more than just not being a bad person."

-- a. lee martinez

to be good is something that has become as natural to me as breathing.

why that is i cannot say.

maybe it was the way i was raised...

the circumstances i've faced in life - positive and negative.

the feeling of love i have from deep within,

the connection to my higher power,

my deep appreciation for all of life...

or maybe it's all of these and more.

anything other than good hurts… it feels suffocation, feels wrong.

but, what is good?

good is right. good is truth. good is sustainable to life and a conscious decision we make about a way of being - each and every day.

good is not overly celebrated or recognized.

but it rewards from within.

it allows us to honor and embrace this beautiful life we've be gifted.

because for me, when i really sit and think about it -- life. is. magical.

these breaths i breathe and feelings i feel are not fully describable with words.

but good is also subjective.

and this is where ethics comes in. and integrity. experience. wisdom. environment. love. 

do we all interpret being a "good" person in the same way?

do we all have the same understanding of the difference between good (right) and bad (wrong)?

and then there are the gray areas…

in between right and wrong.

where does right end and wrong begin?

who sets this gauge?

who is the judge?

who is the score keeper?

18 thoughts to carry with you throughout your day

start your day happy

18 positive thoughts… affirmations… reminders

to carry with you throughout the day

thy will not my will be done.

unlimited creativity flows through me.

my insecurity is no more real than a shadow.

remember, we create in the positive or we create in the negative.

i'm here to bring positive, creative energy into the world.

creative energy can create, nourish or destroy you. 

call forth the confidence to continue practice in the face of mistakes, difficulties and setback.

i deserve financial freedom.

my work is creative and i love what i do.

i am safe.

I don't need anything or anybody else to complete me.

my passion points me toward where I can contribute most in this world.

criticism is a form of caring. there are grains of love in any form of feedback.

when i get past self doubt, abundance flow naturally… almost without effort.

i am an open channel of loving energy.

i move others to joy and inspiration. 

i am a force of light in the world.

abundance is an attitude and a bountiful feeling. 

Frustration moves you

The energy behind frustration… behind anger is a powerful force. It can create a momentum that generates change. A change that you have potentially wanted for a long while – whether consciously or subconsciously, but have not had a force influential enough to make it happen.

Early on in my awakening I thought of these emotions as simply negative. I thought they were bad and we should not allow them to surface. What I have learned, however, is that these “negative emotions” are only bad if we impulsively react to them. This sort of reaction can produce negative and harmful effects where we think, say and do things we undoubtedly regret later on. If we can allow these emotions to simply be… soon enough, they will pass – and in the interim until they do, a lot of introspection and growth can happen.

We always hear -- and truthfully, deeply understand the power that is also behind more “positive emotions” – those of gratitude and love. This power can create change and move you too… to be better, happier and more loving. These emotions are some of the best I’ve ever felt.  However, to maintain these emotions 100% of the time is unfeasible. We are only human and ever-evolving, ever-learning, ever-changing spiritually.

It is important to realize that the emotions we feel – from love and gratitude to anger and frustration - are all essential to our spiritual growth. They provide insight and understanding to oneself and the world around us. All emotions change us and keep us developing on our spiritual path – so long as we are mindful of them.

The Law of Higher Will

excerpt from 

"The Life You Were Born to Live" 

by Dan Millman.

page 381

***

The Law of Higher Will

"From the viewpoint of our separate self

and smaller will,

it's normal to act on the basis

of our own desires and preferences;

when we surrender to our smaller self and will

to the guidance of a higher will

and dedicate our actions

for the highest good of all concerned, 

we feel an inspired glow

at the center of our life."

Life is this simple:

We are living in a transparent world,

and God shine through in every moment.

This is not just a fable ora  nice story;

it is living truth.

If we remember God, abandon ourselves to God,

and forget ourselves,

we may see this truth:

God manifests everywhere, in everything.

We cannot be without God.

It's impossible.

It's simply impossible.

- Thomas Merton

The Freedom of Self Control

"Through discipline comes Freedom."

- Aristotle 

I feel the idea of 'self control' has a sort of negative connotation to it that intimidates people from it. It feels difficult and like hard work.  But without self control, there is only impulse - right or wrong. 

To me, self control is the daily practice of mindfulness. Where in the present moment, you take the opportunity to consider how your decision now will impact your future self… meaning, your future self 5 minutes, 5 days, 5 months from now. Though this practice, you gain awareness of the present moment. You gain the opportunity to check-in with what you want for your future self on a regular basis.

We have circumstances that arise everyday where self control can be practiced. And through the practice of self control… mindfulness… discipline… a connection forges from your heart to your higher power. However you interpret that power. It's a feeling that can be described as magical - exciting, inspiring and energizing… and nothing is more freeing. From it comes a genuine connection to your true self, a humble self-confidence and peace within that you carry within you no matter what good, bad or mundane circumstances come your way. Because they all will at one time or another.

What I've learned through this…  is to simply never give up on your practice of self control… of discipline and mindfulness. You will falter! You will find happiness in acting on impulse and feel that at times it's easier to. But I've learned this happiness is fleeting and only temporary. The happiness that exists with the practice of mindfulness and self control comes from deep within and has no bearing to the present circumstances or conditions - it exists eternally and indefinitely... and is within each and every one of us. We just have to connect to it.

well shit I almost died!

I had a close encounter with my own death 3 months ago - in August of 2014.

Here I was, 27, healthy, happy, going about my merry little life - in fact, I had just hiked the South Sister in Bend, Oregon (10,000+ feet elevation & a 12 hour endeavor!!)  the weekend before everything happened. I felt invincible of death… having the 'what am I going to be when I grow up?' sort of mentality. 

About 2 months leading up to this I had been having an upper back pain that I was seeing a chiropractor for. One day out of of the blue I developed a sharp pain in my right side, that grew worse and worse as the day went on. Before I knew it, it was 4am, I was in the ER being diagnosed with a Pulmonary Embolism (blood clots in both sides of my lungs) and being admitted to the hospital for several days.

what the?

I didn't actually realize how severe my condition was until after 3 days in the hospital when I was able to walk around for the first time and having a passer-by nurse tell me that I was 'lucky to be alive.' In that moment, I fell to the ground and broke down in tears.

2 days later I was able to go home and found myself crying out tears of pure gratitude for my life - with a sincerity I have never felt before….I was in a state of complete confusion for what had just happened and also feeling the most exhausted I have ever been in my life.

It has been 3 months since this happened and I am still in recovery. I now take medication that I will be on the rest of my life and in fact, I am going to see a doctor next week because I still have pain in my lungs when I breath… although this could very likely only be part of the healing process. Unfortunately, the symptoms and recovery are very much alike.

so what am I saying with this?

I guess, I guess that fuck, life is short. and we say this to ourselves and to everyone over and over again. and I'm thankful to have had this experience slap me in the face because I have an even deeper understanding of what it means - life. is. short. The moment for living is right now, not an hour or tomorrow or somewhere-in-the-near-future. Realizing, aka fully understanding this has been and will always be a process. But I am changed from it, forever. The present moment has become more precious to me than it ever has before… whether I'm at work, laughing my ass off with friends, standing in the longest-line-ever at the super market, eating a meal, making love -- it's aaaaallllll precious. and part of it. Part of this experience called life. and although this experience hasn't all of the sudden made me peruse all my dreams and passions and live exactly how I dreamt I should be living (not yet, at least), it has brought me closer to this moment. whatever it may be.

who impacts you

you never know who it will be to impact you

make that difference

a stamp

that is ever lasting in your life

we expect it to be family, close friends, significant others

and they do…

but at times there are those who make a mark on your life --

impacting you so much that it changes you

and when they're gone….

you finally realize

that they changed you.

and how they changed you.

and that because of their impact

they will live on in you forever